Sunday, March 30, 2014

the london diaries. there have been tears.

I am not sure why this trip have been heart wrenching for me so far.  For one, I am not used to being so far from home ALONE.  I miss my wonderful travel companion husband so much it aches... and for some reason being so far away from my bunnies feels painful.  I literally had tears running down my cheeks when my plane took off, and I cried myself to sleep today when I napped after landing at my B&B. I have honestly been a mess. And my heart hurts.

It did help that 1.) I got a wifi connection figured out so that FaceTime communications can commence with the hubby and the bunnies 2.) I found some food and 3.) I took a walk in the neighborhood with my camera and it fed my soul.  Evidenced in the photos above.  After our hard, hard winter in the Midwest I had almost forgotten the thrill of green budding plants and spring blossoms.  I plan to walk around my neighborhood everyday after my training to soak up the blissful way that the English do flowers.

We have established that I am not a fan of traveling this far from home alone, and that I can't remember crying so many tears at-the-drop-of-a-hat, but it didn't help that today was Mothers Day in the UK.  Everywhere I looked was a grandma cuddling a grandbaby or a family gathered to celebrate mom with pink-wrapped gifts and flowers. I loved seeing it, but my own heart strings were stretched too tight.

I would covet your prayers because even though my surroundings are so beautiful (as the photos attest) I am a bit of a mess. I know that God has called me to pursue this work & training, which I hope to be a ministry to women to well,  but I have got to stop the crying.  My sweet USMC, retired Michael J. Blanc wisely said "You need to consider it like a deployment. The first few days suck, but then you need to get about doing the work that you came there for."  Those are my new marching orders.

1 comment:

  1. Karen, this is exactly the way I felt when I landed in London on my way to Cameroun to do mission work in1986. I was so adventurous and brave until I landed in a foreign country, alone. Then I went on th Africa and that was even worse. Men with machine guns greeted me at the airport, and I was alone! Anyway, I do understand but hope that you will get past that soon, as I eventually did, and are able to enjoy where you are, in the moment.