Sunday, March 30, 2014
the london diaries. there have been tears.
I am not sure why this trip have been heart wrenching for me so far. For one, I am not used to being so far from home ALONE. I miss my wonderful travel companion husband so much it aches... and for some reason being so far away from my bunnies feels painful. I literally had tears running down my cheeks when my plane took off, and I cried myself to sleep today when I napped after landing at my B&B. I have honestly been a mess. And my heart hurts.
It did help that 1.) I got a wifi connection figured out so that FaceTime communications can commence with the hubby and the bunnies 2.) I found some food and 3.) I took a walk in the neighborhood with my camera and it fed my soul. Evidenced in the photos above. After our hard, hard winter in the Midwest I had almost forgotten the thrill of green budding plants and spring blossoms. I plan to walk around my neighborhood everyday after my training to soak up the blissful way that the English do flowers.
We have established that I am not a fan of traveling this far from home alone, and that I can't remember crying so many tears at-the-drop-of-a-hat, but it didn't help that today was Mothers Day in the UK. Everywhere I looked was a grandma cuddling a grandbaby or a family gathered to celebrate mom with pink-wrapped gifts and flowers. I loved seeing it, but my own heart strings were stretched too tight.
I would covet your prayers because even though my surroundings are so beautiful (as the photos attest) I am a bit of a mess. I know that God has called me to pursue this work & training, which I hope to be a ministry to women to well, but I have got to stop the crying. My sweet USMC, retired Michael J. Blanc wisely said "You need to consider it like a deployment. The first few days suck, but then you need to get about doing the work that you came there for." Those are my new marching orders.
Karen, this is exactly the way I felt when I landed in London on my way to Cameroun to do mission work in1986. I was so adventurous and brave until I landed in a foreign country, alone. Then I went on th Africa and that was even worse. Men with machine guns greeted me at the airport, and I was alone! Anyway, I do understand but hope that you will get past that soon, as I eventually did, and are able to enjoy where you are, in the moment.
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